Jack Handey citáty

Jack Handey is an American humorist. He is best known for his "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey", a large body of surrealistic one-liner jokes, as well as his "Fuzzy Memories" and "My Big Thick Novel" shorts, and for his deadpan delivery. Although many people assume otherwise, Handey is a real person, not a pen name or character. Wikipedia

✵ 25. február 1949

Jack Handey: 9 citátov20 Páči sa

Jack Handey: Citáty v angličtine

“When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming in terror, like the passengers in his car.”

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Saturday Night Live (1993)

“I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it.”

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Deep Thoughts: Inspiration for the Uninspired (1992), Berkley Books, ISBN 0-425-13365-6

“If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.”

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Deep Thoughts: Inspiration for the Uninspired (1992), Berkley Books, ISBN 0-425-13365-6

“IF YOU ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone.”

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Deeper Thoughts : All New, All Crispy (1993), Hachette Books, ISBN 1-56282-840-1

“I guess we were kinda poor when we were kids, but we didn't know it. That's because my dad always refused to let us look at the family's financial records.”

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Fuzzy Memories (1996), Andrews McMeel Publishing, ISBN 0-8362-1040-9

“Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself.”

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Deeper Thoughts: All New, All Crispy (1993)
Kontext: Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. Basically, it's made up of two separate words — "mank" and "ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.

“Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. Basically, it's made up of two separate words — "mank" and "ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.”

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Deeper Thoughts: All New, All Crispy (1993)

“It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.”

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Deep Thoughts: Inspiration for the Uninspired (1992), Berkley Books, ISBN 0-425-13365-6

“If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."”

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Deep Thoughts (1992)

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